A big reminder

I was lunching with Kwan, a fellow course mate of mine who is a father-of-two boys. We share many common traits and 1 thing that we always use to poke fun at each other are mathematics related jokes.

That aside, yesterday's lunch was rather different. We talked about the tragic incident of a P5 boy who jumped from a building. Many questions surfaced of which 1 of them is: What made him do such a thing? Pressure, we speculated. But who is the one giving him the pressure? Parents, teachers, peers, society as a whole, the education system?

Whatever the reason is immaterial. We concluded that as young parents who will soon advance to parents with school going kids. I asked if we will fall into the category of pushing our students or our own children to the limit or worse still, over the edge. True enough, we want the best and expect the best out of our charges and sons/daughters. However, we should be aware that they too have their limitations. While we should give them the affirmation or praise when it is due, we should also be alert to signs of them being stressed or getting upset over that difficult task.

More often than not, many teachers will push their charges to achieve things that might not be within their cognitive level. As shared with me by Angela, she told me that some of her student's elder siblings in lower primary level are given projects that end up being completed by parents as it is way too hard for the poor kids to complete on their own. Is this a case of letting students discover new information? I think it is more a case of the teacher wanting to have something to put in their annual EPMS so that they can get the desired pay increment or bonus or simply just to avoid getting the dreaded D grade. Since the EPMS is so competitive, us teachers cannot merely do classroom teaching and other 'bare-minimum' duties in order to get a good score. In fact, doing just the bare minimum gets one the bare minimum grade of D which means, no increment, no promotion in grade and no performance related bonus for 3 years.

I am worried that I might end up pushing my students beyond their limit. Worse still, I may even exert too much pressure on Esther to not just be on par but above her peers especially in the academic aspect. However, Kwan told me that as a parent, I can control it and I should. Besides, with the Lord's help and wisdom, I should let Him take control of how He has planned out Esther's journey.

On my way home, I kept asking the Lord to constantly keep me in check as far as my temperaments is concerned. I also prayed that He will give me wisdom and patience on how to parent my daughter. Let her have a happy and memorable childhood. I desire that she will look back years from now having fond memories of her younger days when she could explore many things aesthetically, academically, socially and most important of all, being a person of good character.